The new age lingua franca – version 2.0

Five years on since I posted  http://specs-buffy.blogspot.in/2011/07/new-age-lingua-franca.html and much water has flown under the bridge and now I feel like‘fudge’ in a conversation involving the youth today!

Let us listen in to a chat and you will know why you are a ‘noob’!

“Hey dude..the exam was epic and the Math question got me busted!

Bro…dats bad doe..

I am vamooshed #chirped…

So wass next?

Tickets for IPL..cool beans maan

Oh..with that frenemy??? He is a bugger

He is a photobomb and just spoiled our selfie dude

Why are you turned up bro…will fix him..dont get #chirped

Kk..will give you a bell once I am home “

I can see my dear readers becoming disillusioned and squirming in their cosy chairs and feel annihilated after this tete a tete and frankly I am extinct like the dinosaurs..

Epic to me meant only the Ramayana or the Mahabarata or Illiad or Odyssey..but now it assumes gigantic proportions in terms of potency!

I am wondering why “Bro” did not get the gender equality witch hunters to be up in arms against the chauvinistic word and strike back with “Sis”?

“That is” becomes too epic and so got shortened to dats which is hip and fresh like the gen y!

Pranks are in now I know but what on Earth is photobombing? I surmised it to be some sort of capture of bombings happening on camera, but folks wait, do not jump the gun like me, it implies a person, deliberate or accidentally coming in a photo frame when a selfie is taken…bombed right???

LOL is passé, it is the turn of POS…rack your brains and before you come up with weird expansions, here is the killer “Parent Over Shoulders” whenever parents are keeping the tabs on youngsters while on social media..zapped aren’t you???

Troll to us in good old days meant an ugly creature dwelling in caves but today it alludes a deliberate attempt to “piss off” people on internet!

You are beyond doubt a nerd or a noob or lame if hashtags are not served before appropriate words to emphasize. It “sucks”, doesn’t it???

Never make the mistake of saying “turn up” for the event for it spells coming all “pumped up” and that is ‘fancy wonky’..sorry I am getting into the groove …

All I do these days is zero tasking and of course “YOLO”…chill guys..it augments to read “You Only Live Once”!!!